TIRED

ohhhhh..... long time didnt write my blogger.. 

many things was happened between these few days, we gonna break and become good. izzit im a good girl friend? how can i talk with him without pressure?? i hope that we can always live with happy.

i know he love me but this recently he like do not like to talk. 

he also got call me but the feel not like before.

i so scare when i back my hometown how he treat me? he will come to my house? i think wont, he wont do that, i reject my family, why the matter will happened like this. i do not like the fell. 

he like want me to choose family or him, but i know i love him.

i dont know the feel izzit immediately, but i know till now i still cannot put my hand down. 

i also not dare to talk with my family, that he reject them. i scare the relation will become more worst and two sides also wont give up to say with other.

he think like this also very hard and cant together with me.

he always want to break with me, but i cant....

i really hope he wont say out again.

but i dont think so, maybe we are marriage he also will like this.

i really scare after marriage he also want say divorce. then our children will how?? this must think careful

he always to control me, and i already wear so property and he also will ngam ngam ngam there... i really dont know izzit we really not suit. 

how is the decision for me now?? how can i do for now??

ILOVEHIM =()=

mum, i want to tell you that i love you, you grow me up and i always give the hardest work for you, and now i because a man dont know how to do decision. now i think love is bigger than the family love, izzit this will get punish?? 

i also dont want like that, i do not want my every love relation also cant keep for 1 year. i hope i can do that.

Please do not let me get hurt when i at hometown.

Please find me when you are free.

Please Accept Them. 

ILOVEYOUMORETHANILOVEMYSELF. <3 <3 <3 <3 

You really make me angry.

now everyone also think you are good and think i didn't do anything for them. 

you got go out with them, every good part you already done on their behind, now you are a good ppl they thing.

i really hate you more and more.

i really behtahan on you.

can you dont talk with me anymore. i really tired to serve you.

you are a good girl, i know.

but the thing you do i cannot accept.

i also got help you package the flower, i also got take my heart out to make this better. but why?

why no one to thanks me.

why no one??

i really feel sad on this.

i hope i dont see you more.

GOODBYE.

I'M LABORIOUS HERE.

WISH 好人有好报。

Stomach Ache

one day pass one day, you treat me like nobody.

dont know why will like that d.?!

huh?! so confuse.!!

this two days i keep stomach ache, eat what also cannot make me feel unwell.

yesterday i found the oreo ice-cream biscuit. so happy ^___^

and i bought 4... (dont know can finish it or not)

dont know how to describe my feeling now.

he told me before, i'm only his love. is it he love is himself?

i think he most important thing is his business. 

no one can disturb him about this. me also cannot one.

today, the cat sleep in front of our door. 

M need go out to fetch S but the cat was so terrible.

M take the broom to get the cat away. 

but the cat no feel go get away, it standby at the stair this make M so scare. wakakkakaka :D and then i call her take a bread throw to other side and then she can go down to fetch S.

Finally, she go down, and i gave her a call. she say she are safe.

hahaha!! 

in the end of this day, i have no receive any call from him.

dont know what happen by he.

i scare to ask thing from him. 

scare he say me not mature or what.

sweat... =.=|||

Stomach Still ACHE... 

In The Middle Of The Night

i still busying with my assignment. what a terrible thing. i hope

 no more work to do, no more assignment, no more stress. 

and i can get a happy holiday with my dear.

go to KL.(Pavilion, Sungei Wang, Sunway Lagoon,...) go to the place i ever go before.

actually i really don't know he want me to calm down for what. i so confuse on that.

hope today will be a good day, better day, best day for me.

we will no more argue. he won't say need calm down for a day.

i really hope no more again.

i wish to be a happy girl.

i wish i wont cry behind he again. i feel so stress on this.

why i can't control my tears as well as i can?!

i don't want he say break with me anymore. i hope he won't threat me. then i can be a happy girl.

GOD, please help me get away from this. 

GOD, please today he won't give me one day time to calm down.

GOD, please blessing me this pity girl.

i still with that crazy girl watch the animation.

and she wanna eat the french fries. 

She want me get fat, fatter, and fattest in the world.

SWEAT.

i not wish my blog got people know and see.

Wakakka :D

One Day Rest

RAINY DAY

today, i quarrel with my dear. early in the morning, he call me he say last night he drink beer till vomit. i think vomit is equal to drunk. but he say no. after that, we quarrel quarrel quarrel.........

finally, he say we need calm down for one days, for our future. and we need to walk together, and i just can accept it actually is not willing. but i need to accept if not he will break with me. no one i can tell here. i just can write at here. feel extrication.

we need to be pardon to each other in the future days. don't know my attitude will so emotion. i know this can control, you want me think careful about our problem ant my emotion and my stupid. 

1. i need talk be mature.

2. i need to control my emotion.

3. i need to be a pardon's wife.

4. PLEASE dont easy to say suicide.

if i do all this thingS i can be a wonderful wife... ^_____^

i <3 you dear. muacksss *。*

finally, today i can watch my tudou web drama, i know the god know my sadness. 

let me can see the drama. 

let me wont feel lonely one this days. ^。^

i can watch the "every move you make".

I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THE DAY NOT YET FALL DOWN.

MY DAYS STILL NEED TO WALK.

MY DEAR ARE WAITING FOR THE ENGAGE.

This Is The First

so nervous to write a blog, even i dont know why i have a feel to write a blog. to write i hope to write out my feel in this time, actually no one will watch on this.

i hope this will help me go through my sadness and happiness time.

i hope everything pass faster and i can go back to my hometown, to meet my dear and family, go back to the place that only for me. XD

today, i didn't go out from house till night. morning, my best friend, M she prepared a delicious western bugger, nugget and french fries. i'm proud to be her friend that she can do everything without any response 

till night, we go out for dinner. after dinner, we go home, i drive car and i want drive to the fast line, the car suddenly become faster and my car already pass the half line. and that bad car are come by the back, IT horn a time, this make me so scare, that my legs are paralysis. 

if that im emergency to turn to that line, why the car wont let me go? i know that car can break one, why IT dont want to break? why IT so worse. nothing to say.

thus, i call to my dear, he just busy to serve his new friends. 

i'm sad. 

just want you to give me more and more caring to me.

i know we are at different place. 

this will make us less and less communication to each other.

say about some happy things.

today, M and me together see the japan animation, Yumeiro Patissiere.

i think this animation not bad, it say about cakes and pastries made by a junior girl and she do the best on her cake. the demon cake always practice her to do more and more this about the cake.